Identifying Strongholds in a Time of Restoration

As I move through the second half of my year of restoration, I am in the midst of two fairly intensive Bible Studies. One of the studies is about the Armor of God and the other is Rooted. Interestingly enough, a few friends of mine and I began the Armor of God study during the summer prior to learning that our Women's ministry was going to do it as well this fall. SO that means we get to do it at least twice, which is a really good thing as there is a lot of information to process internally. As far as the Rooted study goes, only coaches and trainers were asked to participate in this study during this round and I was one that was asked to take it as we are working towards being a church family that wraps our arms around folks who are hurting. There are many things from a person's past or even current pain that can be brought out in this process of moving forward and growing in our relationship with God. We want to have resources in place and be prepared to stand ready to be with these folks when that happens. So often groups of people, churches included, do not prepare for the possible outcomes prior to kicking off programs that will "stir the pot" per-say. 

NASA - Apollo/Saturn V Center (Firing Room Theater) July 2016

I find it fascinating that these studies are occurring this year, as God and I are walking through Him working in me to restore me to become the woman He created me to be. The timeliness of these studies is nothing short of impressive and, in my mind (since I do not believe in coincidences), providential. To add to this, the past couple of weeks has been a lot of identifying "spiritual strongholds" that prevent us from experiencing a close relationship with God and prevent us from moving forward in the path He has planned for us. Wow. Sometimes I feel like my head is like a pinball machine. Craziness...

Part of identifying strongholds, especially by looking through the lens of using God's armor, is learning how to identify weaknesses that satan will use to tear us apart. Last night, while doing one of my studies, I began going through my Bible and found a few pieces of paper...printed copies of emails from my past. Emails from about 15 and 16 years ago. A couple of them from men who were friends of mine and my ex-husband's and another from someone who was like family to me. These emails took me back to that time in my life that was so hard to get through. Messages to my ex-husband telling him about how I was financially incompetent, how people at our church would certainly not blame him for the end of our marriage no matter what I had told them, and that he had biblical grounds for leaving our marriage. Then an email from my friend who stated that she would "ALWAYS" be there for me. I had forgotten these messages, even though I am unable to forget that time period in my life. The messages to my ex-husband from our friends were so hurtful as I believed them to be my friends as well, yet they were speaking untruths about me and certainly adding to the conflict and ultimate end to our marriage. Then the message from my friend hurt because she has since ended our close relationship, stating that she never considered me family and did not feel we could continue our friendship. 

NASA - Apollo/Saturn V Center (Firing Room Theater) July 2016

One of the strongholds that I have dealt with for much of my life is feeling insecure and not good enough. Having people who commit to being a support to me betray me and walk away from relationship with me has been incredibly painful. It is apparent to me that the evil one attempted to use, yet again, this part of my life at a time when I am healing and embracing the truth about me. Now let's fast forward to present day. My ex-husband and I are friends, even planning a couple of family vacations with both of our children and with my best friend. Boundaries are strongly established and we choose to create memories for our children. We may be unable to be a married couple, but we are family and we want our children (and one day in the distant future, grandchildren) to have memories with us all as a united family (albeit one that does not happen to live together). One of the friends who sent a message continues to be a friend of mine and of my ex-husband. My friend who has ended our close relationship? While I have very limited interaction with her, I still love her dearly. I still pray for reconciliation at some point, in God's timing.

Why am I sharing all of this? Part of my journey to restoration is learning how to stand firm with God's armor in place. One of the pieces of armor is the belt of truth. I believe that what the evil one means for evil, my Lord uses for good. While satan may have meant to trigger me with these memories, God allowed me to see how I could stand firm with the belt of truth in place. Yes, these were hurtful memories, however I am not the same person and the relationships with these people are not the same either. Do people continue to believe that my relationship with my best friend is "inappropriate"? Possibly. Unfortunately for them, I no longer place value on those opinions. That has been part of the healing that has happened over the past few years.

"Jesus said, 'If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.'" ~ John 8:31b-32

I know I did nothing wrong. I know that my friendship with her is a gift from God and our friendship draws me closer to God, not further away. I know that, even these hurtful memories can not take me away from the arms and love of God. In this year of restoration, God is helping me to identify the flaming arrows of the evil one and stand firm on what I know to be truth. If someone chooses to take sides in something that they don't have all of the information, then that is between them and their Creator.

Oddly enough, I woke up this morning with this tune in my head..... 

I had the privilege of seeing this song performed live a few weeks ago. Ever since then I have been processing these lyrics. Part of releasing these strongholds in my life is doing "the very next thing" and focusing on what God is doing in me and through me. 

Satan, you don't get to use this history of my painful experiences to bring me down. You don't get to hurt me anymore. I choose to follow the lead of the One you feel the need to compete with. I am a daughter of THE King. I am fully armored up and you don't get to have any power over me. My Lord is my God and my Savior and will NEVER leave me or forsake me. 

What are the strongholds that are keeping you stuck in a spiral in your life? Feelings or experiences that make you feel you're not good enough? History of messages spoken into you that lead you to believe you're a bad person or unworthy? Perhaps God is wanting to provide some restoration on your end as well? What is YOUR very next thing?

all contents (c) 2016 Laura Inglis