Just Be Held

I heard this song today and it completely spoke to me. So often we try SO hard to hold on, forgetting that God is holding onto us. It's in these times that He just wants us to let Him hold us. It makes me remember when my kids were small, scared, or hurt and terrified. They were frantically holding on, arms wrapped around my neck. It was during some of these times that I had to pull their arms away from my neck and wrap them completely within my arms, so they would be 100% safe. That's the visual when I hear this song. God just wants us to allow His arms to be wrapped around us. No fighting. Just sit and allow Him to hold us safely and securely. If only we wouldn't fight so hard. Sigh.....

Today I Grieve

Today I am wearing black. I'm wearing black because I grieve. I grieve over the state of our world. I grieve over so many lost relationships that we felt were impenetrable. I grieve over the horrendous happenings around the world. Paris was bombed. Refugees are trying to find a safe place to go, having to leave their war-torn homes. Unborn children continue to be killed. Children are killing their parents. Parents are killing their children. Marriages are falling apart. 

Families are divided. Unemployment continues for so many people or is just around the corner for others. Families are 
losing their homes, resulting in being forced to live in dirty motels (the only thing they can afford, but at least it's a roof over their head), in their car (that may not even run due to inability to afford gas), or in a cardboard box or tent on the streets or in the woods. Children are bullied at school or in the neighborhood...or on social media. Adults are bullied at work. Opinions are deemed not opinions, but facts. We're so competitive that we care more about being right than we do the relationship with the person we're speaking with. OR than we do about possibly learning something and changing our perspective. It IS possible, you know.

We hear a knock on the door. The knock that sounds like it's "supposed" to be a friend (You know the one - Shave and a haircut?). Then you find it's some strange man and you're alone in the home with your child. NO idea what he wants so, concerned for safety, you don't answer the door. OR you run to your gun. You know? The gun that we are supposed to have or NOT supposed to have, depending on the political view someone has. 


We used to hear that one can discuss anything, EXCEPT for politics and religion. No more. Now either you agree with those around you, or you risk alienating the people you care so much about. So you stand quiet. There is so much you could add to the conversation, however....you know they won't hear you and you will likely lose the relationship because you're on the OTHER side, therefore not a friend. Either you believe in gun control or you endorse the killing of children. Either you support that homosexuals can marry or you're a homophobic. Either you agree that homosexuality is "spinal cord sin" and you're a perverted human or you lack understanding and must hate those who are in love with someone of the same gender. Either you believe in spanking your children to maintain control/discipline or you are a permissive parent. Either you avoid spanking your child or you're an abusive parent. If a middle aged single mother and her best female girlfriend live together as roommates, to help support one another emotionally, financially, spiritually, then they must be lesbians. If a single mother is financially unable to support her children or is not present as she is working or taking classes (so she can find a job to support her family), she's neglectful and "should not" have custody of her children.

I grieve that violence appears to be the only response to be heard. I grieve because we run

a risk everyday to be harmed or killed in a random shooting, or a road rage incident, or even in our own home. I grieve because gangs are the only family some people are able to hold as their own, even if that particular gang is one who implements violence as it's way of holding it's territory or to place revenge for some believed wrong. I grieve that those who have committed to serve and protect are targeted whether that police officer is a "dirty cop" or is just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I grieve that people who have willingly joined the military to fight for our freedoms are not being cared for by the same country they serve and fight for.

I grieve. My heart is broken. My eyes tear and water threatens to roll down my cheek, onto my black sweatshirt. Then I am reminded by these still small words I hear inside my heart:

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go." ~ Joshua 1:9

"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God, I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." ~ Isaiah 41:10

In my grief, I cry out to God and ask why. Why is this happening? Why, when so many are trying to be obedient, when many are trying to seek Your will, are we feeling we are being punished? Why are children hurting? Why are people who confess Your name and seek to be obedient turning on one another? Why is it when we choose to love through Your lens, that we are judged and condemned? I don't understand, LORD. Why? Then I read God's conversation with Job and consider this:

"Then Job replied to the Lord: I know that you can do all things; no purpose of yours can be thwarted. You asked, Who is this that obscures my plans without knowledge?' Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know. "You said,'Listen now, and I will speak; I will question you, and you shall answer me.' My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes." ~ Job 42:1-6

I don't know Your plan, Father God. What I do know is that, in my grief, so do you grieve. You tell us that You catch every tear. You feel every hurt. In the midst of this pain, of this horrible time of this world, my job is to:

 "Be still and know that I am God." ~ Psalm 46:10

......and continue to LOVE, even in my grief.

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.' This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'" ~ Matthew 22:37-39

all contents (c) Laura Inglis